Insecurities
by EmilyGrace31
Summary: Magnus has spent hundreds of years hiding his insecurities behind the charming and confident mask he puts up. However, what happens when Alec comes home to find him mid-breakdown? Magnus admits his insecurities, so Alec swears to show his boyfriend that he is perfect, and with the help of the Lightwoods and their friends, Alec works to show Magnus the truth
1. Discovering the Hidden Truth

**Hey, I'm Emily and this is my first Mortal Instruments story. Feel free to check out my Harry Potter fanfics if you want. I don't own any of the characters – Cassie Clare is the real mastermind behind this series. Please review and enjoy!**

Chapter 1

Discovering the Hidden Truth

Magnus stared at his reflection in the mirror. Only dressed in his bright blue briefs, he could clearly see his flaws. His very feminine waist line, his stomach with a creepily non-existent belly button and most of all, his cat-like eyes, which were usually outlined by eye-liner, mascara and eye shadow, but they were all removed at that moment. Sometimes he had trouble deciding what he hated most – it was coming down between his stomach and eyes, currently, and had been for the last twelve decades.

He had been watching himself for the past half hour while Alec was out hunting with Jace and Izzy. Originally, Magnus was going to do paper work, but had split some of his coffee down the front of his shirt and onto his paints. Thinking it was best he change but couldn't be bothered wasting his energy and magic, he went to his bedroom to physically change himself. However, after taking his shirt and pants off, he ended up just staring at himself and not in all a conceited way. He felt his eyes start to water as he fingered where his belly button was meant to be. Magnus had often asked himself 'why?'. What did he do to deserve such an ugly fat stomach? Why did he end up with a demon for a father? Why could he be normal? The only good thing about life was Alec and even then that was going to end eventually due to the perils of immortality on Magnus' part.

_Alec_. Alec was the best thing to happen to Magnus. Magnus loved him so dearly and he knew, despite Alec's embarrassment and shyness, that Alec loved him back. Magnus and Alec still hadn't gone _all _the way, which Magnus was a little glad about – Alec wouldn't see the complete hideousness that was cursed upon the man he called his boyfriend. Magnus had no clue what he would do if Alec ever saw his true body, without make up and magic to keep him looking perfect...probably cry and hide, after all, that's what he has been doing all his life.

Magnus felt a small droplet fall from his eye as he finally broke and let his feelings of remorse for his looks out. Glaring at his appearance in the mirror, he let out a scream and punched the glass, which shattered. Glass cut his hand, embedding itself in his flesh, as well as falling and breaking into smaller pieces on his floor. Magnus stared numbly at his hand before he let out a howl of agony, not for the physical pain, but the feeling of his heart breaking. He crumpled to the floor, ignoring the shards of glass as some cut his legs. Panting as he cried to himself, thoughts echoing through his head. Why? Why is he like this? Why did he deserve damnation for who his father is? Why? Just _why?_ Magnus stayed curled up in a ball, still and silent as tears slipped from his eyes, their stream never ending. One falling as another one came. He no longer paid attention to his surroundings.

Magnus didn't know how long he laid there. At one point, he thought he heard the front door open, but ignored it. He stayed where he was and felt ready to sleep. As his eyes shut, he heard footsteps near the door.

They popped open as Alec called out loudly, "Mags? Where are you?"

Magnus slowly registered that Alec was home, as a welcome warmth entered his heart, however, with this warmth, came the realisation that his lying in his own blood and shards of glass, his body has cuts all over the tanned skin. His cheeks are damp with drying tears and his eyes red and puffy from all the crying. Magnus blinked as his eyes widened, and he went to sit up, but the bedroom door opened and Alec stepped it. He was looking at the ground. Magnus tensed when he knew he had no time to clean up. Alec's gaze rose, until it landed on Magnus. His eyes widened in shock, before horror took over his features.

"Magnus!" he shouted in terror and worry, running to Magnus' side faster than an average human, with the aid of his angel blood and the agility rune carved into his skin. "What happened? Did you trip? Are you alright? Can I help you? Do you need anything? Oh my god, Maggie, how did this happen to you? Was it a client? If anyone hurt you, I swear I'm going to-"

"Alec," Magnus interrupted, as Alec rambled on at such a fast pace, he had trouble understanding. "Wow, Allie, slow down." Alec immediately stopped at the use of his nickname which Magnus called him when in private. His eyes softened as he reached out and traced the tear tracks on Magnus' face.

"Oh, Magnus, baby, what happened to you?" Alec asked him softly, his fingers moving to run through Magnus' thick black locks. Magnus had to try to concentrate on what he was saying at the feeling of Alec's fingers running through his hair sent him to his own personal nirvana.

"Ah, n-n-nothing. I–uh–merely lost my footing and landed into the mirror, making it break." Magnus stuttered, his eyes lowering so he didn't have to eye straight into his boyfriend's blue eyes.

Said blue eyes stayed on his face, as Alec took in what Magnus said. Slowly, he opened his mouth to speak. "Maggie, please don't lie to me. You know I hate that."

"Lie?" Magnus muttered, hating it more and more, but he had an image of confidence to uphold and he couldn't show his perfect Alexander just how weak he really was. "I didn't lie. I tripped."

"Baby, please." Alec leaned forward and rested his forehead against Magnus'. "_Don't lie to me._ Just tell me the truth. I won't judge you or anything. You know I love you and because I love you, I need to know when you are hurting because my job as your boyfriend requires me to comfort you in times of need. Let me protect you, baby, let me be your rock. I won't let you down." Magnus felt his eyes start to water again as he shut them tightly and willed himself not to cry again. Alec, however, had different ideas. His hand travelled down Magnus's face and rested on his cheek and he whispered. "It's okay to let go and allow yourself to show a softer side, Maggie. I'm here, I won't let you drown in your own tears. You've been doing that for decades, I'm here to catch them now and help you float. I'm here, baby, I won't let anything harm you again. Just let it out, Maggie. You can tell me anything."

Magnus felt tears slip from his eyes and his watery eyes got worse and he started sniffling before finally, the floodgates opened and Magnus burst into tears. Alec didn't gasp or anything, he merely lowered his hands to Magnus shoulders and pulled his boyfriend to his chest, wrapping his strong arms protectively, encasing Magnus in a loving embrace. The warlock felt basking in the feeling of being wanted by another person. Magnus brought his hands up too, and placed them around Alec's waist, clutching the younger man. Alec sat there, ignoring as shards to glass cut him too, his mind preoccupied.

"What is wrong, baby?" Alec whispered after at least fifteen minutes of Magnus' crying and Alec's comforting silence.

"I...I...I don't...deserve...you." Magnus sobbed, but still clutching onto Alec.

Alec's eyes widened and tried to pull away from Magnus to look at him in the eyes, but the warlock wouldn't let him. "You don't deserve me? Maggie, if anything, it would be the other way around. And why don't you deserve me?"

"Because you're beautiful. In the inside and out." Magnus started to choke on his sobs and Alec rushed to try and calm him down.

"Are you saying you're not beautiful?" Alec asked, shocked. Magnus is beauty itself. And Magnus is also the confident, not this scared and sad man in front of him. "How can you think that?"

"I've spent hundreds of years being called the devil child, ugly, an abomination. I've spent years having pretend nothing hurt me and to fight for myself and protect myself. I hurt so much, Allie. So, so much. And you don't deserve to be with such a haunted man, a man who can't move on from his past. You deserve so much better. In fact, you deserve the best."

"But Maggie, you _are_ the best." Alec countered, softly grabbing Magnus' face again after he finally managed to pull back away from the warlock to look into his eyes. The eyes Alec had fallen in love with the first time he saw them. "I can't get any better than my Maggie." Magnus let outa shriek and started shaking his head. "Yes, you are, Magnus. And no matter how you look, you are the man I love and I know that you've spent years trying to protect yourself, but I'm here now." Magnus continued to cry and Alec swallowed harshly, not liking the pain he could see his boyfriend in. "What in the name of the Angel do you see ugly about yourself, Maggie?"

"My eyes, my stomach, my thighs, my hair, my teeth, my lips, my personality-" Magnus started rambling off, as Alec's eyes widened again. How could his perfect in every way boyfriend think this about himself.

"You know what Maggie," Alec said quietly, as Magnus stared at him in hope, love and a bit of desperation. "I'm going to show you all the reasons I love you and how you are so perfect."

"But-" Magnus started, but Alec shushed him softly, raising his hand to place gently on Magnus' lips.

"I love you, Maggie." Alec said, as determination entered his tone. "And if I have to shout to the whole world...or you...I suppose...as to why my amazing, love, beautiful, wonderful boyfriends is perfect, then I will." Alec paused as Magnus watched him with eyes full of wonder. "You are perfect Magnus Bane," Alec said firmly, his hands moving down to capture Magnus'. "And most of all, you are always going to be my Maggie, my love and my perfect other half...but it seems to me that it's time to show you that."

Alec passionately kissed Magnus on the lips before winking at his shocked boyfriend and striding out of the room, moving to get the first aid equipment for Magnus' cuts as Magnus' eyes stayed where Alec had been standing before hand, only one thought in his mind. _What is Alec planning?_


	2. Selfie

**Hey, thank you for all the reviews! I thought I would post the next chapter faster than usual since you guys are so kind (I responded to the reviews at the bottom). I hope you enjoy this chapter, please review and remember that Cassie Clare own all rights to these characters. Thanks! :)**

Chapter 2

Selfie

Magnus groaned as the sunlight beamed down directly on his face, disturbing his sleep, which disappointed him, since he was having..._fun _dreams of him doing certain activities with his blue-eyed boyfriend. Rolling over to try and escape the light, Magnus gasped as he came with a face full of some soft and scented items, as when as something crinkling loudly against his chest. Sitting up, still a little half-asleep, Magnus stared down at the objects resting on a spare pillow. Sitting there, slightly mused now, was a bunch of rainbow coloured roses, the bright blue paper wrapped around bottom of it slightly crinkled from when Magnus had rolled on top of it.

Slowly reaching out, Magnus picked up the bouquet and pulled them close to his chest, sniffing the sweet fragrance of roses. His eyebrows shot up as he properly took in the appearance of the flowers now that he was completely awake. They were all white with splashes of random rainbow colours. Red, blue, orange, green, purple, you name – these roses had it. Magnus recognised them as the expensive roses you could buy that get dye put into the water they sit in, so that it travels up the stem and makes the flowers turn the colour of the water. He remembered pointing them out on a date with Alec when they walked past a florist's shop and these type of flowers were outside for potential buyers to view. At the time, Alec had merely rolled his eyes, but Magnus told himself that he should have known that Alec would have made a mental note – his boyfriend is that sort of person.

Grinning softly, Magnus sniffed the flowers again, before something sharp poked him in the nose. Pulling back quickly, Magnus noticed the small little card hidden between the masses of roses. He went and pulled the card out from where it sat between them, and placed the roses down before smiling as he looked at the card. On the cover was a picture of him and Alec from when they started dating. It had been a selfie that Magnus took of them on their third date when they had finished watching a movie. Magnus could still remember the shock and horror when he cracked a joke about a selfie and Alec has said "A selfie? What's that?". Of course, to make sure his boyfriend had the best mundane education, Magnus showed him how to take a selfie. Alec complained after Magnus took the twentieth, but Magnus quickly shut him up when he planted a surprise kiss on Alec's cheek right when he took the picture. Alec being Alec, blushed bright red as his eyes widened and he went into his awkward 'what-are-you-doing?' facial expression.

Magnus stayed staring with happiness in his eyes at the picture on the front, before finally opening the card – admittedly after taking at least fifty deep breaths, if Alec was there, he probably would of complained at the amount of Carbon Dioxide Magnus was releasing into the atmosphere. Magnus shut his eyes tightly for a few moments, nervous but excitement drumming through his body before he finally opened them and read what Alec had written.

_To my Maggie,_

_I know I told you last night that I would show you how perfect you are – well, I'm not breaking that promise. I also know that you're probably now sitting there, about to have a panic attack at the realisation last night did happen and it wasn't a dream, but just calm down love. And now, you'd be going into your 'I'm-still-so-embarrassed-but-now-I'm-getting-flattered' mode. I know you pretty well, my perfect Maggie. I hope you like the roses and come out to the kitchen when you're ready, I took a day off so we can spend it together. Please come soon, I can only spend so much time without you. _

_With all my love,_

_Your Alexander xx_

Magnus felt his eyes watering as he read through the letter, laughing softly when he started panicking and kept reading, before calming down and releasing what Alec was saying was true. _My Alexander_, he thought with a thrill, before his smile fell of his face. This meant...this meant Alec saw him..._shirtless_. He would have seen Magnus' fat and bellybutton-less stomach. Magnus' hand went to his mouth as I stood up and stumbled to his wardrobe. Oh no, that wasn't meant to happen. If only he hadn't been so fucking stupid and caught up with his image and then waking up to those beautiful flowers from his even more beautiful boyfriend who wanted him to meet him in the-

Magnus suddenly opened his wardrobe doors and stepped in to his large walk-in wardrobe, which was only a few metres smaller than his bedroom. Quickly yanking on ripped dark blue jeans, a sparkly red singlet top and his favourite pair of black heeled boots, Magnus jogged out of his wardrobe. He paused to make sure his hair looked presentable and quickly put a thin line of black eyeliner above his eye, making it point out at the side. Grabbing his jar of glitter, his got a handful and started placing it in him fashionably, but in a rushed manner. Putting the jar down when done, he looked at his appearance in the smaller mirror, since he broke his full-length one in his fit of rage the night before. Deciding it was the best he could do, he ran out of the bedroom, stopping in the doorway to the kitchen to catch his breathe. _Boy, am I unfit_, Magnus thought to himself as he lost his harsh breathing and straightened his shoulders out, giving his usual confidence look back.

Smiling, Magnus entered the kitchen, looking cool as normal on the outside, while inside, he was screaming to see his beloved man. Alec was sitting at the kitchen table, reading some thick book and munching on a piece of buttered toast. He looked up when Magnus arrived, grinning at the older man.

"Good morning, Mags." Alec said, putting the book aside on the table and putting the half-eaten toast on the plate before standing up. Magnus stared at him, shocked, Alec never put his book down for anyone. "How did you sleep?"

"Ah...fine." Magnus winced on the inside at the slightly confused tone he had, as Alec walked toward him, but seeing his boyfriend so carefree and with so much adoration in his eyes, he was having a little time concentrating.

"Just fine?" Alec sighed, as he reached forward to hug Magnus, before placing a chaste kiss on the warlock's lips. "That's sad."

"I had a better wake up, though." Magnus informed Alec, who ushered him to a seat at the table and gave him a plate of warm chocolate chip pancakes that Magnus loved. Magnus grinned at the sight and allowed Alec to plant another kiss on his lips. "Thank you for the roses, baby, they were beautiful."

"Not as beautiful as you though." Alec said, walking to were the coffee machine was and turning it on. "I couldn't see anything in any of the shops as beautiful as you. Those pretty average flowers had to make do."

Magnus choked slightly on the pancake he had just taken a mouthful of and did a very rare thing – blush. Just like blushing was rare for the warlock, saying such sentimental things out loud was rare for Alec. "Uh-well-um...ok." he stuttered, unsure how to answer.

"So, I thought we could watch a movie." Alec suggested, sitting down on the chair opposite Magnus. "Of your pick, of course."

"Ah, yeah, sure, if you, uh, want to." Magnus murmured, while asking himself what made him get so shy and awkward all of a sudden. "Why don't we go watch one now?"

Alec grinned and nodded as they both stood. "I'll get popcorn and drinks ready while you go choose the movie and get the TV on, cool?" Magnus nodded, walking out of the kitchen, down the hallway and into the lounge-room, before heading straight to where the large black T.V was sitting with bookshelves filled with different DVDs on either side of it. Magnus turned the T.V on, before going and looking at all the DVDs and trying to decide between _Pitch Perfect _or _Pirates of the Caribbean_. He knew which one Alec would prefer, but he knew the one he liked more. His thoughts were interrupted when Alec walked in, a bowl of popcorn in one hand and two cans of coke in the other. Alec put the items he was holding on the table in front of the worn and bright red sofa in the middle of the room. "Just go with _Pitch Perfect_, Mags, I know it's one of your favourites."

"Oh please," Magnus snorted, but he was already opening the cover and taking the disk out of the box and clicking the button on the side of the DVD player to open the little section from where the disk goes. He rolled his golden-green eyes as he put the disk in its compartment and pressed the button again to close the disk holder. "We both know that it's because it has Adam DeVine in it."

"Seriously Maggie, it's only cause Skylar Astin is in it. Get. It. _Right_." Alec laughed as he jokingly mocked the phrase he had heard Magnus say so many times. Magnus ran and jumped at him, throwing himself at his boyfriend and Alec was quick to catch him as Magnus' legs wrapped around his waist and his arms around his neck. Alec placed his hands on Magnus hips as the two men started laughing louder. "Oh, my _silly_ Maggie."

"My _adorkable_ Allie." Magnus countered, kissing Alec on the lips. Alec stepped backwards and didn't expect something white, small and very fluffy to run behind him, causing him to lose his balance and topple onto the sofa, Magnus with him. "Chairman Meow! You do not trip your daddies over. Bad kitty." Magnus groaned at the pathetic look the white hamster-like cat gave him. "Oh, do _not_ give me that look, mister. You know I can't take. You're just like your other daddy. And _you_," he smirked at Alec, who was blushing. "Way to give me a heart attack, babe." Magnus continued, breathing heavily.

"Ouch, I landed on my phone." Alec groaned, pulling his mobile out from his back pocket and grinning cheekily at Magnus when his eyes traveled south on his boyfriend's body.

"Would you like a massage? You wouldn't want any numbness or bruising down _there_, would you?" Magnus said suggestively, his hand running down Alec's chest as the ads on the disk started playing softly in the background.

"Hmm, I'm not so sure, I've heard you can be very dangerous with your hands." Alec joked, before his expression grew serious. "I love you, Magnus Bane." He grabbed the back of Magnus' head with his left and tugged the older man down and planted a firm, open mouthed kiss on his boyfriend's mouth. Magnus' eyes shot open when something small and fluffy jumped over the top of the couch to land on his head and the sound of a camera going off went.

Pulling back from the kiss, Alec grinned and showed him his phone, which was on the camera page and had a picture, slightly out of focus, of him and Alec kissing. Magnus' eyes were wide open as a white blur was jumping onto his head. Alec was clearly smiling into the kiss, his eyes shut and an overall relaxed look on his face. Magnus reached up and pulled the white fur-ball of his head as Chairman meowed angrily in the process. Alec chuckled at the sight before speaking."I love you so much, Maggie, and I wanted to show you that life with you can be really shocking and surprising and so many adjectives that I can't describe it. But I cannot imagine another life without you. Plus, you've taught me so much, like, what a selfay-"

"Selfie." Magnus corrected automatically.

"_Selfie_." Alec paused to grin at Magnus who was smiling at him. "Is. You've also taught me so many other things, like, how to be myself and _more importantly_." Alec reached down and grabbed Magnus' hands, linking their fingers together. "You've taught how to love and I'll love you unconditionally, Magnus. Forever and forever. And I know that you think that I don't like the fact that life with you can be so _surprising_ and _hectic_ at times, but it's the fact that it's life with _you_. I wouldn't want a different life. Plus, we have our cute little baby." Alec smiled softly at the purring cat, which had just manage to lay itself over both their laps. "_Even_ if it is a cat. Plus, I wouldn't trade our family for anything else in the world, because to me, you _are_ my world."

Magnus' eyes started watering, as he moved and kissed Alec softly and lovingly. "I love you so much, Alexander."

"I love you too," Alec told Magnus, pulling back to rest their foreheads against each others. "Now, do you feel that you deserve me more?"

"A little." Magnus admitted.

"Well, 'a little' isn't good enough. I'll have to keep trying." Alec moved away and reached for the remote and pressed play as _Pitch Perfect_ started. "Now, let's watch this movie and compare whether Jesse or Bumper is hotter."

"I think we know who's going to win that one." Magnus giggled, as he clicked his fingers and the lights went down. He and Alec snuggled into each other and for the first time in ages, he felt that someone had finally accepted his surprising lifestyle and nature, and he wouldn't change anything about his Alexander in the world.

**So, that's chapter 2. I hope you enjoyed it! Please tell me if you have any ideas of what you want Alec to do to show Magnus he's perfect - I'm willing to accept ideas, just post them in the reviews or message me :) (And also if you're a Jesse or a Bumper fan - I'm curious to see what the results are :D)**

**_Intoxic_ \- Thank you so much, you're so sweet! I always believed that behind Magnus' confident mask, he had plenty of insecurities, but I was so nervous I wasn't portraying them right. Personally, Magnus can be a hard character to portray in fanfics, I really didn't want to screw up his characterisation, but I'm glad you liked how I put his emotions into text :) Alec is planning a few different thing to show him, you'll just have to wait and see ;) Thanks for reviewing!**

_**deviant97**_** \- Did I update soon enough for you? :P You're actually a huge reason I updated so quickly, so I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I'm glad you felt that way, I was so nervous about posting it (which I kind of mentioned above). Thanks for loving it and reviewing! You get lots of love from Allie and Maggie (hehehe, I just love those nicknames - I had to mention that...) Thanks for being so kind as well!**

**So, that's it folks. I don't when I'll post the next chapter and please review and give me ideas. I have a few already, but I know some of the best imaginations are those of the readers. Thanks, Emily :) **__


	3. Jace

**Warning: Possible offensive language to some readers. Swearing does occur as well as dirty themes (not smutty though). I don't own the characters, they all belong to Cassie Clare. P.S. Please review!**

Chapter 3

Jace

Magnus sighed as Alec ran passed him, shirtless with his black jeans unzipped and unbuttoned, threatening to fall down his slender his. Alec was meant to meet Jace five minutes ago at Taki's, but they caught up doing the type of 'fun activities' that Magnus had been dreaming about the night before. After Alec got a text from Jace, mid-taking off his jocks, Magnus would like to add, he suddenly realised that he had arranged a meeting with him. Of course, he started running around like a headless chook, shouting questions at Magnus for where his belongings where because he just had to get to _Jace_. The blonde's name made Magnus sick to the core. He stayed on the sofa, glaring as the feeling of the cool air was getting to the exposed skin from where Alec had unbuttoned his shirt. Allowing Alec to see so much of his stomach was a huge step for Magnus, but the shadowhunter just had to go and destroy all his hope and trust. Alec ran passed Magnus was looking under the sofa, his pants now buttoned and zipped up. "Hey Magnus, have you seen grey jacket?"

Magnus gave his boyfriend a frown and rolled his eyes at him, ignoring Alec's hurt look. "Which one? You'll have to specify. Is it the worn one? The not-as-worn one yet it still looks like a piece of rubbish? The ripped one that smells like sweet? The one that smells like demon blood-"

"You know which one, Maggie." Alec said softly, giving Magnus a small smile, obviously used to the monologues Magnus says when he's upset about something. Magnus rolled his eyes again and casually started to inspect his painted nails.

"Do I really? Cause lately, it seems like I don't know much." He snapped, as silence was the only answer. He took a deep breath and made sure not to look at Alec. One look and his confidence would be all gone and he would have to apologise for being so rude, but Magnus wanted to make his point. "It's probably somewhere in the kitchen since that was where we were amidst our passionate loving, until someone decide to be all high and mighty and leave me dry. For _Jace_." Magnus lowered his eyes onto the coffee table which still had the empty bowl of popcorn from when they watched _Pitch Perfect_ – neither of them had been bothered putting it away yet.

Alec reached forward and grabbed Magnus' left him, entwining their fingers. "C'mon Mags, don't be that way-"

"And what way should I be, Alexander?" Magnus yelled all of a sudden, ripping his hand out of Alec's, causing Alec to jump. Alec's heart ached at the pained, yet confused, look on Magnus' face. "You spent so much time two nights ago, after that bloody movie, going on about how you love me _so much_, how you won't _abandon me_. Yet it seems like everything that comes out of your mouth is all a pile of shitty lies. You made me trust you, I was _so close_ Alexander. But then, when it comes to choosing between me or that stupid cockblocker Jace, it's all, 'oh Jace, let me come to your rescue'. But guess what Alexander! I don't _need_ you if that's how you're going to treat me. I don't appreciate being treated like that. In the end, I don't need _anyone_."

Magnus took another deep breath as his eyes started watering. Alec stared at him with an unreadable expression, before reaching forward again and grabbing Magnus' hands. "You don't mean that, Maggie-"

Magnus eyes widened as he stood up. "You don't know what I mean, Alexander-"

"Stop saying that, Maggie." Alec said, as his phone went off. He groaned and pulled it out of his pocket, checking the screen and trying to shut it quickly, but it was too late, Magnus had seen the message sent from...you can guess it.

_Where r u? I've been waiting 4 ages. Get here soon or I'll leave – Jace._

"You better get to your golden boy, he's calling for you. You wouldn't want him to leave you like I'm about to." Magnus started to sob, as he tried to hide his face from Alec who leapt up and tried to comfort him. "No Alec, just go!"

"No." Alec said firmly, trying to make Magnus take his hands away from his face.

"Just leave me in peace. All I've done since meeting you is hurt and...and love." Magnus let out a loud cry, falling back onto the sofa. "I'm not use to it-"

"That's exactly it. You not properly use to it." Alec fell to his knees in front of the warlock. Alec paused to look down at his hands. There was silence again for a minute, but Magnus refused to look at Alec to see what he was doing. Eventually Alec continued. "But you can get use to it. I'll help you." Alec raised his hand and started wiping drying tears off Magnus' face. "Oh Maggie, I love you so much."

"You shouldn't." Magnus cried, leaning into Alec's palm. "Nobody should."

"Well I do." Alec said quietly, but strongly. "I always will. I've told you this already. And no amount of yelling or crying is ever going to get rid of me, you silly man."

"But the threat of losing Jace would." Magnus said weakly, as Alec's eyes widened.

"This is why you're upset. You think I'd leave you for Jace." Alec suddenly chuckled softly and got off the floor to sit beside Magnus on the sofa. Magnus leaned into his side as Alec put his arm around him. "I _hate_ to break this to you, Mags, but Jace will _never_ like me like I liked him. And I will never love him like I love you. Plus, Jace doesn't care that we're together, he just cares that I still turn up to our sparing work-outs. I would never leave you, not for anybody. I love you too much to do that. One thing I love about you is that you allow me to enter your heart. You let me in. You might see it as a weakness or an insecurity, or something bad, but baby, I see it as a sign of trust and love. For you to trust me so much that you let me into your life and the dark little secrets you hide, well it means so much to me. I love you and the day I'd no longer be with you would be because I couldn't stop it. It'd have to be a lot to stop me from being with the perfect man I love. But I won't just _leave_ you, my perfect man."

Magnus sniffled but smiled at the blue-eyed shadowhunter, who was watching him with adoration in his eyes. It made Magnus want to cry again, but with happy tears this time. "You promise to never leave?"

"I promise with all my heart." Alec swore seriously, moving forward and placing a gently, but loving, kiss on Magnus' lips. He leaned back a few centiemetres to be able to keep talking. "You have to do the same too, you know."

"I promise that I'll never leave you. Not if I can help it." Alec suddenly pulled back from Magnus, staring him in the eyes.

"No, not a 'not if I can help it'. It's just a plain yes, cause I'll never let you leave me." He said, borderline frantic. He fisted the sofa on either side of Magnus' slender frame as he inclined back further.

"Shhh, _shhhh_, love, I promise." Magnus giggled before Alec grabbed him and pulled him for a much deeper, passionate and toe-curling kiss. Alec started unbuttoning his own jeans again. "But Jace-"

"I sent him a text earlier when you fell onto the sofa. You know, when I didn't answer you for a few minutes. I told him I couldn't come because I wasn't feeling well. He didn't want to risk getting sick because then Jocelyn wouldn't allow him to see Clary because it might risk her getting sick. Well, something along those lines, anyway. You get the point of it." Alec said, as he started to kiss down Magnus' neck.

"Alec," Magnus groaned, racking his fingers through Alec's hair. "You have to stop kissing me like that or my toes will cramp from curling too much cause of your hot kisses. You're making me go all tingly."

Alec pulled back to smirk at Magnus. "Is that a bad thing?"

"I dunno." Alec's smirk deepened as Magnus moaned, grabbing the belt-loops on Alec's jeans to pull him closer. "Oh, just _kiss me,_ you silly man."

"I thought that was _my_ nickname for _you_."

"_Alec_."

"Right. On it."

**So, that was chapter 3! I hope you enjoyed it. I thought it might be a good idea to start with Alec making sure Magnus knew he was never going to leave and then expand on all the reasons he loves him. Plus, I can imagine Jace causing a huge rift between them, so I decided to go with that. If you have any ideas on what I should do, please comment in the review section or message me :)**

_**Intoxic –**_** Thank you for reviewing again. It means so much to me! 3 I'm glad you like the flowers, I was unsure that I was putting too much into one chapter, but what you said helped my decision of not regretting it afterwards :) Thanks for wishing me lots of inspiration and liking what I made Alec do. P.S. I read your fanfic 'Maybe We Are A Fairytale?' and I loved it! Keep up the good work on yours. IF ANYONE READING THIS HASN'T READ THAT FANFIC – READ IT. IT'S AMAZING! :D**

_**Jazz **_**-Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! You're so kind :') I'm happy that you liked it and got the feel of happy but sad – that's what I wanted. I hope you keep reading! :)**

**So, that's the reviews for now. Thank you and please review!  
Emily Grace xx**


	4. Unchained Melody

**Hi, I'm back! I'm so sorry about the late update! I had my birthday and my siblings birthdays and then had exams and life has been so busy! I made this chapter a little longer in a way to say sorry. Please don't hate me! ****Thank you for reading and I don't own the characters – Cassie Clare is the true mastermind! Please review and enjoy! :) (warning – has some swear words *cough* f bomb *cough cough*).**

Unchained Melody

Alec ran up to Magnus' door and paused when he heard the song of some dance song playing, the words muffled through the door, but the beat thrumming up into his feet from the floor. A smile slowly spread over his face as he pulled out the spare house key Magnus gave him to use. Pushing the key into the lock and twisting it, the door unlocked quietly, as Alec sneaked inside, shutting the door behind him softly. He tiptoed into past the kitchen and into the living room, placing his bag silently onto the floor and smirking as he watched the man he loved above all others, dance and sing to some poppy song.

"_I'm just a Holy Fool, oh baby he's so cruel but I'm still in love with Judas, baby. Oh, oh, oh, oh, I'm in love with Judas._" Magnus sang along with the song, jumping and leaping across the room, shedding glitter with each step. Alec stayed still and his smirk turned to a smile as he lovingly watched Magnus dance. Magnus seemed to be in such a happy mood, so contagious as he ran and jumped onto the sofa, about to leap off it on the other side when Alec saw his foot catching on the back of it. Instead of soaring through the air, as Alec expected Magnus intended to, Magnus was crashing to the ground. Quickly, with his fast reflexes, along with the aid of various runes to help his speed and agility, Alec jumped forward, covering the metre distance between the two boyfriends and was quick to grab at Magnus. Magnus shut his eyes a second before expecting an impact with the ground, but found himself in a pair of strong, muscular and _very_ familiar arms.

Alec breathed a sigh of relieve as Magnus' shocked eyes turned upwards to stare at him. Suddenly, he felt anger y towards the warlock. "Oh, by the angel, are you alright Magnus? What were you thinking? Jumping off the sofa like that? You could've broken your ankle, or worse! Your _neck_! Honestly Magnus, are you okay? I swear, if you do that again-"

"Alec, you're here! I thought you had to go slay some demon." Magnus said excitedly, as Alec placed him standing on the ground, before resting his hands on Magnus' slim hips.

"False alarm." Alec responded, nervously biting his lip before his original feelings of anger and frustration took over. "Now what were you think you were doing?"

"Dancing."

"Dancing? Magnus, that wasn't dancing! That was jumping off a cliff to your death!"

"Ah, it was a _sofa_, Alec."

"Same thing!"

"No actually, you see, sofas are-"

"Magnus," Alec yelled, releasing Magnus from his grasp. "You jumped off the sofa, d'you know how reckless that is?"

"Says the man who goes out to slay demons every night. You cannot talk, Alexander!" Magnus retorted, as his eyes hardened and he took a step away from Alec.

"Excuse me? That's my job! What you were doing was plain idiocy! You jumped off a freaking sofa, Magnus!"

"I was dancing!"

Alec's face was turning red as Magnus' posture was going stiff. Stepping away from his warlock boyfriend, Alec screamed out loudly. "Trying to kill yourself more like it!"

"For the last time," Magnus growled, eyes narrowing fiercely on his shadowhunter, "I. Was. _Dancing_."

"Next time you feel like dancing, don't bother asking me to join you cause I ain't fucking catching you again!" Alec swore loudly, waving his hands frantically around his head in a manner that Magnus usually would've laughed at if he weren't so peeved and frustrated. Alec started to realise how this fight was going to end – with him and Magnus moping around until one of them finally apologised (which always took ages because of their pride) – and admitted he had to stop it before it gets out of hand.

"If you care so fucking much about it, then just go, Alexander! I do not have the patience to deal with this!" Magnus went to storm out of the room, but Alec leaped forward and grabbed his hand, before yanking Magnus towards him. Magnus collided with his chest, his eyes widening, but Alec didn't seem to notice the force from the collision, instead, his blue eyes were shining brightly, fierce with the fresh emotion running through his body.

"You think I don't care? Well, that's the exact opposite, because Magnus, I do care. I care so fucking much when it hurts for me just imagining you getting a paper-cut. The thought of you-the man I love more than anyone else in the world-being hurt…I…I can't handle it. Magnus, you need to understand that I would do anything for you: lie for you, cry for you, laugh for you. By the angel, I would die for you! And you know how people say it's so romantic to sacrifice yourself without a second thought for your lover? Well, I disagree with that theory. I would sacrifice myself for you _with_ second thought, because that shows that I know I would end up dying, but I still would do it. Because I would die for you – I'd die a thousand painful deaths just to wake up next to you every morning and see your beautiful face first thing every day. I'd die to see you laugh, to see you smile, to see you fucking cry if it meant it was the only way to see you. I'd die to see you. So you better not die before me. Don't you get it? I care so much that I can't handle thinking of you gone. You might say I don't care because of my bad reaction, but that was my way of caring. Loosing you is my worst nightmare. Loosing you is my worse outcome in life. I could slay a thousand demons and become the greatest shadowhunter in the world, but that would be nothing if it didn't have you by my side."

Alec took a deep breath, his chest heaving as Magnus stared at him, tears streaming down from his eyes. "You really mean that?" Magnus whispered, as Alec nodded.

"By the angel, yes, Mags." Alec leaned his forehead against Magnus'. "You are my every thing."

"You lied." Magnus said quietly, causing Alec to look at him, confused. "You said earlier," Magnus continued, "that you didn't see any demons. But that isn't true, is it? You did see a demon. You saw one which showed you your greatest fear, didn't you?"

Alec stared at Magnus, eyes wide and mouth gaping. He slowly nodded, confirming Magnus' suspicions. "How…how did you…"

"How did I know?" Magnus supplied, to which Alec nodded in response. "You always get affected by demons in different ways. I've never seen you act so…so…fierce and angry before when last time I jumped off the sofa. Last time, you just laughed and warned me not to do it again. But this time, you were scared. I can tell when you're affected by demons, Alec. I should've seen it straight away, I suppose."

"I shouldn't have snapped and reacted so badly. It's just; I did see a demon, which showed me my deepest and darkest fear. I was haunted by what I saw and didn't expect to see you nearly fall of the sofa. I'm sorry." Alec said, reaching over and grabbing Magnus' hand and pulling Magnus closer, softer this time. "Forgive me?"

"Of course," Magnus grinned before joking. "Just don't do it again."

"You know I only do it because I love you." Alec whispered, as Magnus smiled and leaned forward, kissing Alec.

"And I love you too." Magnus said, his breath caressing Alec's face as the song he had been dancing to ended and a very familiar one came on, as a romantic air took over. "Dance with me."

"Mags, I don't dance." Alec started, before seeing Magnus' pout and sighing. "Fine, just don't go jumping off any sofas."

"Agreed." Magnus nodded, leaning their foreheads together again as they unclasped their hands. Magnus' went to Alec's shoulders, where they were loosely slung. Alec's went tightly around Magnus' waist, holding the two together tightly.

_Oh, my love, my darling_

_I've hungered for your touch_

_A long, lonely time_

_Time goes by so slowly_

_And time can do so much_

_Are you still mine?_

_I need your love_

_I need your love_

_God speed your love to me_

"I remember when this song came out. It was really popular. It's 'Unchained Melody' by the Righteous Brothers." Magnus said as they swayed along to the beat. "I _hated_ it, cause it was singing about a type love I had never known. A type of love I longed to feel. A type of love I never thought I would feel. You must understand, Alexander, I have never felt this way before you. You are my first true love. My first everything." Alec felt his eyes water.

"I love you." Was all he could choke out, before pulling them closer if it was somehow possible.

_Lonely rivers flow_

_To the sea, to the sea_

_To the open arms of the sea_

_Lonely rivers sigh_

_"Wait for me, wait for me"_

_I'll be coming home, wait for me_

Alec loosened his grip on Magnus, stepping back and grabbing Magnus' hand before twirling the taller man. Magnus had to duck slightly to get under his boyfriends arm, but smiled, eyes filled with joy and Alec started to step around more and they danced around the room. Magnus giggled when they started getting faster, losing the beat of the song, but becoming more entranced in the dance and the love they were feeling. As the music got louder, they speed up more and started giggling in a lovestruck manner, sneaking kisses every third or fourth second.

_Oh, my love, my darling_

_I've hungered, for your touch_

_A long, lonely time_

_Time goes by so slowly_

_And time can do so much_

_Are you still mine?_

_I need your love_

_I need your love_

Alec prepared himself as the music crescendo increased and hit its peak. Using his ability and speed to good use, he surprised Magnus by suddenly picking up the warlock in a bridal carry. Both of his arms supporting the warlock as he started to twirl the two around. Not too fast to make Magnus sick, but fast enough that Magnus started laughing loudly, his head thrown back and eyes full of joy at the unexpected act. Alec laughed with him, watching his lover's expression and reaction to being twirled around in the spot in his arms. A grin spread across his face as Magnus' happiness became infectious.

_God speed your love to me_

_Lonely mountains gaze_

_At the stars, at the stars_

_Waiting for the dawn of the day_

Alec let out a gasp when he accidentally lost his footing slightly, before slipping and causing the two to crash onto Magnus' sofa. Gasping loudly, Alec looked up at Magnus, who paused, before bursting into even louder laughter. Alec started to giggle before laughing again and the two started tearing up from the force of their laughs and started feeling stitches in their stomachs. Alec moved in-between Magnus' legs, helped Magnus get his head onto one of the cushions decorating the sofa. While getting comfortable, Magnus opened his legs more to give Alec enough room to lie down, leaning with his two arms on either side of the warlock's head. Their laughter slowly died down as they gazed lovingly at each other with deep sincerity.

_All alone I gaze_

_At the stars, at the stars_

_Dreaming of my love far away_

"Alec," Magnus said, breathing heavily, which was also being down by Alec. "I love you so much. I'm sorry you had to see your deepest and darkest fear while working today."

"Do you want to know what my deepest fear is Mags?" Alec took a deep breath, before softly kissing Magnus. He pulled back from Magnus' lips, less than a centimetre away, before whispering. "It was losing you."

_Oh, my love, my darling_

_I've hungered, for your touch_

_A long, lonely time_

_Time goes by so slowly_

_And time can do so much_

Magnus stared at Alec with round eyes, before Alec kissed him. "Mags, I know we were talking about your insecurities other day. I know you think that you're unlovable, but I just want you to know, no matter what happens, you'll always be loved. Even in the darkest of days and hardest nights. And that person who will always love you – is _me_."

_Are you still mine?_

_I need your love_

_I need your love_

_God speed your love to me._

**Ok, so that's it for now. Thank you for reading – it means a lot to me! :)**

_**Intoxic – **_**Thank you for reviewing again! Haha, it wouldn't be Malec without Magnus' jealousy of Jace :P It would have to be a key part of Mag's characturisation. I will take note of what you said and I WILL write a posy on it. It is now in my list of ideas, near the top, but might not be posted for a while because I want to make sure I do a really good job on it for you :) I like your idea – thanks for the inspiration and idea. Thank you for liking my story! :D**  
_**vhs – **_**Aww, thanks! I'm sorry about the late upload – I hope it made up for the lateness! I'm glad you think it's cute – I think everything about Malec is cute (when it isn't sexy ;) ;) hehehe). Thank you for loving it, that means a lot to me! :D**

**So that's it. Thanks for those who reviewed and I'll try and get a new chapter soon! Please review and if you think of anything you want me to do, just message me or say it in a review. Okayyyyy, baiii! Love, Emily Grace xx**


End file.
